More Funny Stories

This past summer we had Gramma and Grampa visit from Idaho. We were sitting at the dinner table making plans for the evening. Logan asked if we could go do...something, I can't remember what...and Brent said,
Brent: "Yes, Logan, soon".
Logan: "How soon? Long soon or soon soon."
Obviously when Brent and I say soon it doesn't always mean that.

Apparently Ellie had a cobweb stuck to her hand...
Ellie: Dad, it won't come off. It's in a raccoon.
Dad: What??
Ellie: It's in a raccoon, like a butterfly lives in a raccoon.
Dad: Oh, a raccoon.
Brent of course understood this to mean cocoon, but he told me that rather than correct her he just enjoyed the way she said it.

Brent has earned the title of Magic Daddy. I don't have a title outside of Mom or "Aww, Mom" when the kids don't like what I've asked them to do. Brent one day did something for Ellie that she thought was amazing and asked...
Ellie: Dad, how'd you do that?
Dad: (In Brent's most self-confident tone with a smirk to match) Magic.
Ellie: (adoringly) You're my magic daddy.

Ellie was preparing to take a bath so this dialogue transpired with her completely naked the entire time.
Ellie: (Using her whole body to tell me) Mom! Yesterday there was a BIG spider on the toilet and Logan came and swiped it away!
Mom: Wow, you're lucky to have such a great brother.
Ellie: Yeah, he's magic, just like Daddy.

Brent was home alone with all three kids while I was at work. He was sitting on our bed with all of them lined up next to him. Logan and Avery had fallen asleep and Ellie, the die hard, was in between them. She was bored, so she started poking Avery in the face.
Dad: Stop it Ellie. Leave your sister alone so she can sleep.
Ellie sighs and rolls over to face Logan.
Ellie: (whispering in Logan's ear) Loser. Loser. Loser. Loser. Loser.
She's got the little sister thing down pat.